(CLICK TO TWEET THIS) Or, as I said in my previous post on birth parents, “If you expect more than one can give, you will surely receive less than what you hoped.” And it will hurt. They weren’t thinking of the challenges they would face; of the difficulty in raising a troubled son or daughter, of how they would treat you when you did right or wrong, or how they would act when they let you down. So if there are years left to endure in your broken home, then do so with in mind, and work now to become the change you desire. But in their actions and behaviors, in their mindsets and their beliefs, is the example you need to become the person they were.
But the world will feel it too, if you don’t realize your mistake. You may be eligible for the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP), also known as food stamps. My boss is in his early 40s and is a father of two. My boss often tells me, totally unsolicited, that his daughter is “very attractive,” a “perfect tall blonde,” and “so beautiful.” He says boys are fawning over her and she wants to start dating.Then he paused, looked at me, and said “I bet you had that problem!” Without thinking, I instinctively responded, “Actually, I didn’t, because my parents didn’t raise a whore.” I was raised in a devoutly Christian home in which provocative clothing and behavior was forbidden, and dating wasn’t even a consideration.
My boss has been acting weird/standoffish towards me since I made this comment, and understandably so. This is problematic on multiple levels, including that you shouldn’t be calling teenage girls “whores” for expressing a perfectly age-appropriate, culture-appropriate interest in dating.
The Department of Transitional Assistance (DTA) administers SNAP benefits.
SNAP provides a monthly benefit to buy nutritious foods.
But I think that one of the greatest causes of our broken homes and broken minds; of the anger and sadness so many accept as their normal way of life, and the inadequacy and helplessness they learn so young, isn’t the conditions or circumstances of their childhood per se. Nor is it entirely the restrictive rules they may establish (that traps kids or demeans them), or the discipline their parents might force (that hurts them or embarrasses them).
It’s something no small amount of kids say every day amongst their friends, or quietly to themselves.
I realized afterward that I may have sounded like I was insulting her and/or your parenting— and that very much wasn’t my intent.